ho Really Won?

ome time ago Baron Von Lodge was the head of a small country near Switzerland known as Lilliland.

Lilliland, like its neighbor, Switzerland, had always been a neutral country. In other words, it did not take sides in any international crisis or war of any kind.

This policy was partly due to a philosophy of peach and also because Lilliland was such a small country that taking one side or another did not matter on the world scale.

One day, the Baron was informed that a royal family from another country had moved into the Lilliland Hotel and planned to stay indefinitely. Professor Hamblin was asked by the Baron to see why they decided to come to Lilliland.

Professor Hamblin was informed that they moved away from their country in fear of their safety. It seemed that two factions were about to declare war on each other in that country. One side was known as the Browns, and the other side was the Greens. A battle between them was imminent. The royal family did not want any part of the conflict and moved away temporarily to neutral Lilliland.

The battle began between the Browns and the Greens. There were about 100 soldiers on each side. Both sides planned a big victory party after the battle in two large banquet halls.

At the end of the first day of battle, the number of soldiers left on the battlefront fell by ten percent, or now 90 soldiers on each side. But the battle continued the second day, and another ten percent of the soldiers did not survive, now leaving 80 soldiers on each side. By the end of the third day, 70 soldiers were left standing. By the sixth day 40 soldiers of the original 100 were standing. There were now more dead bodies on the battlefield than live ones. By the end of the ninth day, only 10 soldiers on each side were left standing. But the battle between the men in brown and the men in green did not cease.

Finally, during the tenth day, only one soldier was left standing. His uniform should have been either green or brown, but it was red from all the bloodshed. He looked all around the field and saw that his comrades were dead and, in dismay, he turned his gun on himself and killed himself.

The two banquet halls had bands playing and food was to be served to the victors, but no one came.

What was the war all about? No one can remember for sure. There were no victors or losers, only nothingness.